Monday, October 05, 2009

Internet Dating Workshop - Gloucester 17 october

The internet has always been a good way to meet new people, and many users have gone on to get married. These days it’s become even more important because it’s a lot cheaper than going out to bars or on dinner-dating events.

This Internet Dating Workshop is hands-on and takes place in a specialist IT training room. We limit the number to ten, so everyone has their own computer and and internet access. You will learn how to:

  • develop your own tempting and engaging profile;
  • carry out internet searches for ideal matches by location, interests, age, work, etc. And preferred combinations;
  • keep your profile at the top of the search lists for your ideal partner;
  • develop the right strategies for success – when to wink, what to write in emails, how to chat, etc;
  • protect yourself when you ask for a date;
  • get the best from the first, second and third date.

A professional photographer from Gold Seal Photography will also be there on the day. And you might want them to take a portrait photograph of you that’s ready to load on to any dating site.

The workshop will be presented by Bryony Anne, Results Dating Coach. Bryony hosts Speed Dating, Singles Wine Tasting and Singles Dinner Dates at selected venues in Southern England and has her own weekly local radio show on Stroud FM.

The workshop starts at 9.45 am for a 10.00 kick-off and finishes at 12 noon. We will email you details of the venue and joining instructions when you book.

Go to www.thedatingdoctor.co.uk/news/events to book your place.



Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Five Tips to Be a Confident Speaker and Presenter

Posture – you must stand tall,but look relaxed. Roll your shoulders back, raise your head so you grow an inch and rise slightly onto your toes when you first start speaking. This is the 'power' stance and make you look in charge and keeps you on your toes.

Stance – when you're up there speakering your body is split into two halves. Your bottom half, from your waist down, should be still. And you should move your top half, from your waist up, to show passion. Take your hands out of your pockets and try not to move your feet. In particular don't shuffle from one leg to the other, don't do a little nervous dance and do not pace up and down in front of the audience. That's called the 'trainer's trek and completely distracts them. However you can move closer to them so you are more intimate with the audience at key moments.

Gestures – you should use arm and hand gestures to emphasise points and show passion. But never point at the audience as it a sign of aggression. The larger the audience, the bigger you need to make your gestures so the guy at the back can see them.

Eye Contact – look at everyone in the room for a couple of seconds in turn. Make sure that you move your head so they see you looking at them. Eye contact tells the audience that you're connecting to them and it also gives you feedback on how well you're doing. If they're nodding off or look bored, change the pitch, and volume of your voice.

Pace – take it slowly as we always speak fast when we're nervous. Slow down and emphasise your key points with one or two second pauses. Although it's always better to go slow than fast, vary the pace of your talk and slow right down in the important parts.

Speaking in public is a skill that can be learnt, but practise makes perfect. So the professional speaker's mantra is 'practice, practice, practice.'

Monday, August 10, 2009

Ten More #Dating Tweets

  • Firting with a stranger will add a spark to your relationship and make their day. Not only that, but it's fun.

  • If he doesn't call within three days, call him. If he's still interested, organise another date otherwise dump him.

  • "Inaction breeds doubt. Action breeds confidence. If you want to conquer fear, don't think about it just get busy and do it." - Dale Carnegie

  • Love is like a deep pool that never dries up - Taoist proverb

  • Ask for their phone number with CIA. Give compliment, state intent (to talk more), ask for their number.

  • "Kindness in words creates confidence. Kindness in thinking creates profoundness. Kindness in giving creates love." - Lao Tzu

  • Always look at their face when they're talking so you appear to be interested in them not the TV in the corner.

  • "The greatest danger is not that our aim is too high and we miss it, but that it is too low and we reach it." - Michelangelo

  • Give her two red roses, each with a note. The first one says "For the woman I love" and the other, "For my best friend."

  • "Happiness depends upon ourselves." - Aristotle

Sunday, July 19, 2009

A Load of Silly #Chatup Lines

Here are a collection of silly chatup lines that I've previously posted on Twitter and Facebook. They don't really work unless you treat them as a joke or you've both had a lot to drink. But they're fun and harmless.

...I've lost my teddy bear, can I borrow you?

...if I follow you home, will you keep me?

...Hi I'm John. So, how am I doing?

...if I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together.

...is it hot in here or is it you?

...could you give me directions to your heart?

...you must be tired as you've been running thru my mind all night.

...if you were a flower i would pick you.

...I must be lost I thought paradise was further away.

...excuse me I've lost my phone number, can I use yours?

...did it hurt when you fell from heaven?

...there must be something wrong with my eyes, I can't take them off you.

...I'm new round here, could you give directions to your house?

...where have you been all my life?

...I need a phone, got to call my mum and tell her I've found the girl of my dreams.

...what's it like to be the most beautiful woman in the room?

Friday, July 03, 2009

Something for National Kissing Day on Monday

As it's National Kissing Day on Monday 6 July I thought I'd tell you about the Nibble Kiss.

The Nibble Kiss is delicious and adaptable because it can be tender and loving one minute and playful and fun another. It's one of the few kisses in which you don't use your tongue. If you want to find out how it feels, just gently bite your own bottom lip.

Either the man or the woman can initiate the Nibble Kiss. If she withdraws her tongue slowly from his mouth he will usually follow into her mouth with his own tongue. She can then gently nibble the tip of his tongue. But she mustn't bite.

Alternatively, and more pleasurably, she can back off slightly and nibble his bottom lip. He can return the pleasure by trying to nibble hers. Then they might both end up trying to nibble or suck each other's lips in a playful way.

Sucking rather than nibbling is a lovely variation on this kiss. You can also nibble or suck your partner's upper lip. And if you are very dexterous, you can rub your nose against the inside of your partner's upper lip whilst sucking or nibbling their bottom lip.

There are more erotic kisses in my book The Art of Erotic Kissing which you can download half-price this weekend. Go to www.thedatingdoctor.co.uk/books/kissing.html

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Ten More #Dating Tweets

  • What you say is not as important as how you look and how you sound. You must come across as confident, relaxed & friendly.

  • "The one thing we can never get enough of is love. And the one thing we can never give enough of is love." Henry Miller

  • Have no expectations so you can shrug off the fear of rejection.

  • Read their body language when you chat to them so you get a feel for what they think of you.

  • Switch off your iPod when you're out and walk with an open and friendly posture. You'll be surprised what happens.

  • If you chatup two people together, treat them the same and let them decide.

  • There's a pick-up agenda in clubs & bars. This doesn't happen when you chatup strangers in shops, airports & art galleries.

  • "Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened." Dr. Seuss

  • Most couples start out arguing about one thing and, within five minutes, are arguing about the way they are arguing.

  • When you flirt by laughing at silly things together and make sure you touch them on the upper arm at the same time.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Dinner of Love in London on 19 June

A good friend of mine has organised a dinner date with a difference. Dinners of Love are an incredible evening with wonderful people all simmering with the potential of love…

“The most unexpected wonderful and magical evening. I felt like I’d walked right into an adventurous, loving and colourful storybook. Superb group of people who I truly hope to see again” (Sharon)

“This is a wondrous love filled event. An amazing way to connect with others.” (Cate)

Imagine an intimate, candlelit and sumptuous dinner of love, surrounded by beautiful people in a sensuous, relaxed and very friendly atmosphere offering simmering potential, and an incredible experience! This is an entirely new concept in love, friendship and relationships. It’s an opportunity for a truly experiential evening.

You’ll have a fabulous evening, a great party, delicious food, meet gorgeous people and get to participate in the exercises and “games” designed to break down traditional barriers to meeting new people. A cocktail of activities based around the theme of love. An evening of fun and joy and passion!

Love is always in the air at “The Love Dinners” you might meet someone special and you will certainly meet lots of other LOVEly people.

Things happen as a result of a Love Dinner!

The next “Dinner of Love” is on 19 June and takes place in Islington, North London. Access is by private invitation only. For more information go to www.dinnersoflove.com and to book email Emily at emily@dinnersoflove.com.

If you speak to Emily, please mention my name.

Peter

aka The Dating Doctor



Friday, May 29, 2009

A Dozen Top #Dating Tweets

  • Date disaster...he points out his ex in same restaurant and she's stunning. The bitch.
  • RT @FlirtingExpert: Flirting is the spice of life. If you can flirt, you will never be bored. Never be alone. Lighten up and Flirt On!
  • Chatting...talk about what interests them, not what interests you.
  • Flirting...use personal space to tease them and build desire.
  • Date disaster...her profile said blonde, slim and sexy. She was short, cuddly and brunette, OMG.
  • RT @dralexbenzer: The Ten Commandments of Modern Dating 4) Thou shalt not get sloppy drunk during a date.
  • It is better to have loved and lost Than never to have loved at all - Alfred Lord Tennyson
  • RT @dralexbenzer: The Ten Commandments of Modern Dating 2) Thou shalt not yammer on your phone during a date.
  • Flirting...use your smile that lights up your eyes to disarm them.
  • First Date...short and sweet is best. A drink in your lunchbreak or after work, you don't want to be stuck with a bore.
  • Second Date...needs to be memorable so you get beneath their skin. Be interested in them and interesting yourself.
  • Third Date...this is make or break. If you want to see each other again, then you're dating. So make sure it's right.

Friday, May 22, 2009

A Dozen Ways Women #Flirt With Their Eyes

Women have 52 flirting signals, whereas men have only ten. Of the 52, they have twelve which use their eyes to connect and attract men. The list below is not in any particular order.

The Flirting Triangle is when she looks at your eyes, down to your mouth and back to your eyes. She will usually do this when you are talking.

The Lingering Look sends the signal that she can’t take her eyes off you. She uses this when you are both in a small group of people and you’re doing the talking. When you finish speaking she will continue to look at you for a few seconds longer before she looks at the person who’s taken over the conversation.

The Look Away and Back is when she makes eye contact with you and then looks away for a few seconds before she looks back to make eye contact again and smile.

The Sexy Look Across the Room is a form of the look away and back, but it’s across a crowded room. She will make eye contact with you and smile. You will watch as she looks slowly around the room before she comes back to you and makes eye contact again with another big smile. She can do this from over thirty feet away and the message is that you are the most interesting man in the room.

The Sideways Glance. She will use this when she’s sitting to the side of you, but nor next to you. She will glance at you quickly and then back so you catch the movement out of the corner of your eye. If you don’t she will do it again with a bigger movement. As you turn to look at her, she will look back so your eyes meet and she will smile or give you a Peek-a-Boo or Diana look. She can use the Sideways Glance up to fifteen feet away.

The Glance Back is sometimes called the over the shoulder glance and it’s when she looks back at you with her head tilted down slightly. This is the famous old movie signal where they look back as they ride off into the sunset and is a classic way to pull the heart strings. She might combine the Glance Back with a wink or she could lower her head and give you the Diana look as well.

The Diana Look is when she tilts her head down and looks at you from under her eyelids, she might combine it with a blink to flash her long eyelashes at you. She often uses the Diana Look when she’s taking a sip of her drink.

The Eyebrow Flash is probably self-explanatory. It’s the term I use to describe how she raises both her eyebrows at you for less than a second. She might raise only one, in that case it’s quite a cheeky signal and has sexual connotations in Japan.

Peek-a-Boo is when she looks as you demurely behind something. It could be a menu or a magazine. In the 19th century it would have been a fan. It’s a playful peek-a-boo game that women often use to play with men.

Wink. Need I say any more except that sometimes she winks quite quickly so you may not notice it.

The Mouth Gaze. This is a very sexual signal where she stares at your mouth for about ten seconds when you’re talking. It will probably melt you.

The Come Hither Stare is when you both make direct eye contact across the room and she looks you up and down. She will finish at your eyes with a smile, she might even combine it with an eyebrow flash or a wink. You’d be a fool to ignore this one.

For more click on my tips on flirting.



Friday, May 01, 2009

Five Things about the First Date

Keep It Short - you don't want to be stuck with someone who's a bore. So meet for drink after work or a coffee during your lunch break.

Dress To Please - wear clothes that are appropriate for where you're going. But make sure they can see that you made an effort.

Smile When You Meet - show that you're pleased to see them. Greet them with a beaming smile that lights up your eyes.

Show You're Interested in Them - talk about the things that interest them and animate your head in response to what they're saying. They will happily talk about where they live, holidays, work, interests and hobbies, and their taste in music, films, etc.

Say Goodbye in Style - if you want to see them again agree a date and time before you part. Guys always try and kiss her on the cheek or lips, otherwise she'll think you don't fancy her.

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Masterclass in London on 19 April

My colleague, Bryony Anne, and I are running a Dating Masterclass in Central London on Sunday 19 April. It’s a practical dating workshop that’ll have a big impact on your dating results. Although it’s on behalf of Spice, you can join the other 12 people as my paying guest. Booking instructions are at the bottom of this page.

These days dating can be really frustrating, especially as you often don’t know what you’re doing right or doing wrong. Whether you’re just still looking or back on the dating scene after a break up, this one-day workshop will give you some new ideas and impetus to move forward. The workshop will cover…
  • Where to Look for “The One”: Understanding what you’re looking for and new ideas where you might find your One.
  • On-line Dating: Picking the right dating site, developing a great profile and ways to get noticed. Tips for email and chat, handling your responses, follow-up and that first phone call.
  • Speed-Dating: Making an excellent first impression, putting your best foot forward and getting matches. Ideas for follow-up and the next date!
  • First Impressions: Some thoughts on the impression you give and how others perceive you. Ideas and simple suggestions on how you can turn things around and get results you deserve.
  • The First Date: Techniques to make sure that you come across as an interesting person who’s interested in your date. Other ideas for getting the best out of that first date.
Kick-Start your Love Life: Although you know you want to meet someone special you may just feel overwhelmed about getting more pro-active and are not sure where to start? On this workshop you’ll have a good time with like minded people and discover plenty of simple ideas, sensible plans and suggestions based on exercises and activities. You’ll feel more confident and able to focus on an action plan in 2009!

Sunday 20 April, 9:45am to approx 4.30pm
Central London location. Cost is £58 which includes teas/coffees & light lunch

Book your place through the Spice website (www.spicelondon.co.uk), or by calling them on 01784 497070.

Friday, April 03, 2009

Poll on Where to Find the One

Please give me your views on the best places to meet a potential partner.

Friday, March 20, 2009

Internet Dating Primer

The internet is a wonderful way to connect to people who you would not get the chance to meet in any other way. But you need to spend some time up front to create a good profile.

The better you know yourself, what you are about and your best bits, the more confident and together your profile and ad will sound. Write your profile from the heart. Think in marketing terms - say what the product is (you), what the benefits are (what you like), who is your ideal customer and who is not. You also need to look at your competition and see how you can stand out from the rest of the crowd. This works in advertising, so it'll work in the world of Internet dating.

You will know how effective your profile is by the type and number and type of responses you get. Some of them will be off track, so tweak your ad and profile.

Let your imagination run wild about the kind of person you want to be with and the kind of relationship you want to have. Write all this down in note form. Use this information in your profile to filter out the ones you don't want to meet. Also use it as the criteria to check against their profile and develop questions to ask them.

If you were a sales person, you'd expect to set up a meeting with ten out of every hundred letters and phone calls, to be asked to quote by five, and to sell one. The same happens in internet dating. If you are a woman you can expect to get a hundred responses to your profile. You might email back and forth with about a dozen, meet five face-to-face, and start a serious relationship with one.

But be warned, it can be addictive. So set yourself a limit, say one hour a day for one month and see what happens.

BE ANONYMOUS AND BE SAFE

  • Think up a nickname. You must never give out your full name as they might be able to find you through the search engines.
  • Create a Hotmail or Yahoo email account under your nickname.
  • Get a cheap pay-as-you-go mobile number so you don't jeopodise your normal mobile number.
  • Never tell them where you live or work, just use the name of the nearest big town.
  • Never give them your real email address or phone number.
  • Always meet in a public place and tell a friend where you're going and something about the person you are meeting. Get a friend to call you after an hour or so you have a reason to leave if you need it.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Dating Masterclass

I’m running a Dating Masterclass in Birmingham on Sunday 15 March. It’s a practical dating workshop that’ll have a big impact on your dating results. Although it’s on behalf of Spice, you can join the other 15 people as my paying guest. Booking instructions are at the bottom of this page.

These days dating can be really frustrating, especially as you often don’t know what you’re doing right or doing wrong. Whether you’re just still looking or back on the dating scene after a break up, this one-day workshop will give you some new ideas and impetus to move forward. The workshop will cover…

  • Where to Look for “The One”: Understanding what you’re looking for and new ideas where you might find your One.
  • On-line Dating: Picking the right dating site, developing a great profile and ways to get noticed. Tips for email and chat, handling your responses, follow-up and that first phone call.
  • Speed-Dating: Making an excellent first impression, putting your best foot forward and getting matches. Ideas for follow-up and the next date!
  • First Impressions: Some thoughts on the impression you give and how others perceive you. Ideas and simple suggestions on how you can turn things around and get results you deserve.
  • The First Date: Techniques to make sure that you come across as an interesting person who’s interested in your date. Other ideas for getting the best out of that first date.

Kick-Start your Love Life: Although you know you want to meet someone special you may just feel overwhelmed about getting more pro-active and are not sure where to start? On this workshop you’ll have a good time with like minded people and discover plenty of simple ideas, sensible plans and suggestions based on exercises and activities. You’ll feel more confident and able to focus on an action plan in 2009!

Sunday 15 March, 10am to approx 4.30pm
Park Inn Hotel, West Brom, just off Junction 1 of the M5. B70 6RS
Cost is £45 which includes teas/coffees & light sandwich lunch

Book your place through the Spice website (www.spicebham.com), or by calling them on 0121 353 6161.



Monday, August 06, 2007

Blog Has Moved

I've now moved my blog to...

http://www.thedatingdoctor.co.uk/news/

Peter Spalton
The Dating Doctor

Friday, April 06, 2007

Find, Attract & Keep Your One

On 21 & 22 April I running a weekend workshop in Nottingham. It’s called “How to Find, Attract & Keep Your One” where you’ll discover the secrets of finding a perfect partner.

You’ll learn where and how to meet your soulmate. How to approach them and look confident and relaxed. How to make small talk, and sound like the interesting person you are. How to flirt and use your body language to make people feel comfortable. And finally, you’ll learn the secrets of seduction.

Life’s too short to miss out.

So for details and to book go to www.thedatingdoctor.co.uk/weekend/

Thursday, March 29, 2007

Confidence Boost

I recently did a interview on BBC Radio about a survey that the BBC had just completed on "what makes a woman feel good".

The THIRD most mentioned thing was being told "I love you".

The SECOND most mentioned thing was being told "You've lost weight".

And what makes MOST women feel best of all is 'being chatted up by a stranger'.

Check out my audio file at http://www.thedatingdoctor.co.uk/tips.html to see how to do it!

Sunday, March 18, 2007

First Date

Believe it or not, one of the girls on Saturday's Flirting Safari ended up having coffee with a guy she'd met ten minutes earlier.

I took six apprentices (five girls & one guy) into a bookshop to coach them on chatting up strangers. One of the girls approached a guy in the thriller section and ten minutes later they were having coffee together. She 'broke out' after 15 minutes with a promise of another date. That's a win!

Just shows how you could find your one anywhere. Join my Flirting Safari to learn how.

Peter, The Dating Doctor

Friday, February 23, 2007

Art of Kissing

I heard on the radio that it's National Kissing Day today.

A good snog is intoxicating. Try it with…
  • eyes open.
  • nibbling their bottom lip.
  • flicking the tip of your tongue across their lips.
  • moaning – it creates vibration in your mouths.
  • kiss with white wine or champagne.
Check out more of my tips at http://www.thedatingdoctor.co.uk/tips.html


Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Ditch the Ipod!

We naturally isolate ourselves from people in public places; being told as children not to talk with strangers! But these days it could be having drastic affects on your love life. Recently during a Flirting Safari, one of the ladies didn’t approach a ‘gorgeous’ looking man because he was attached to his ipod – the moral of the story being that if you walk around ‘engaged’, you may be missing out!

So don’t miss your opportunity, ditch the ipod and be available, the person next to you on the bus or in the queue, could be your ideal partner.

For more information of how you can be learn to be more ‘available’ visit www.thedatingdoctor.co.uk